Lesson 1 - The Accuracy of Your Self-Image
Surprisingly, many people have distorted ideas about their weight. You may not be as overweight as you think you are. Conversely, you might be more overweight than you think you are. Usually, however, people tend to perceive themselves as 'fatter' or 'uglier' than they really are.How and why does this happen?
Well, there may be a variety or reasons, but it boils down to how you choose to see yourself. When you look in the mirror, what do you focus on? Do you check the flubber accumulating under your chin, or do you admire the flatness of your stomach? Do you even think about your weight? On the other hand, do you continually compare your appearance to others? If you find that you obsess over your physical appearance in this way, you may be feeling insecure about the way you look. The question is, are you insecure about the way you look because of the way you actually look, or is your insecurity stemming from a self-perception of yourself which is innaccurate?
If you feel bad because you actually don't look great, then the first thing you need to acknowledge is that looks don't really matter. People may judge you on appearances before anything else, but once you open your mouth they will look for your other qualities in your personality.
Also, if it is the case that you are not happy about being overweight, then it is in your power to do something about it. The best thing about being overweight is that it is something which is not permanent. So this is your chance to become healthier and feel better about the way you look.
However, you must consider whether you fall into the second category, which is that you are insecure about the way you look because you don't see yourself accurately. It may be hard to believe, but there are many people out there who cannot see what they actually look like. Ever heard a really skinny person complain about wanting to lose weight? Well, they actually think that they are fat. They've become so used to focussing on what little fat they have that they have convinced themselves that they need to lose weight.
Overweight people can also suffer from distorted perceptions of their weight. Commonly, what can happen is that a person will look at themselves in the mirror and say: "you are fat". These words can do more harm than you think. First of all, if the person is only a few pounds overweight, then "fat" isn't a very accurate description. "Fat" is a label - not a description. To the person, "fat" could describe someone who was obese, and so instantly, the person is associating their weight problem to that of an obese person. Something more like, "I am 15 pounds overweight" would have given the person a more accurate self-image. On the whole, it is better to avoid labels like "fat", "chubby", and even "overweight" (although when I use the term, I simply mean "over the healthy weight range").
The second problem with saying "you are fat" to yourself is that it is damaging to your self-esteem. Why is this bad? Because your self-esteem affects almost everything in your life, from the way you interact with others, to your general happiness. If you catch yourself having negative thoughts about your appearance, or any other part of you, then I strongly suggest that you read Self Esteem by Matthew McKay and Patrick Fanning. Understanding the importance of how you talk to yourself can drastically improve the quality of your life.
So, before you attempt to lose any weight, it is vital that you try to be as objective about your weight as you can. For those of you find out that you have less weight to lose than you previously imagined, the task will seem much easier and less impossible. Also, ascertaining a more accurate image of yourself is likely to make you feel more confident about the way you look.
Now, the question is, exactly how much weight should you lose? You will find the answer to this is in the next post.
posted by Nik Saunders @ 9:09 PM
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